How do you RELATE?

For most of you women out there, you go to your OB or midwife at least once a year for your annual "check-up" to catch anything problematic early on. Most of you visit your dentist at least twice a year to get your teeth cleaned and to prevent any problems such as cavities, gum disease, etc. When you've gone to these medical professionals, are you bummed or disappointed when they give you a clean bill of health? No, it's like getting a super big gold star! Isn't it awesome when they say, "Gee Jill, you have incredibly healthy teeth. Do you know what would take your teeth to the next level? Flossing daily rather than weekly." Who wouldn't want professional insight to help you go from good to great or simply tell you to keep doing whatever you're doing?

Or maybe you're on the other end and you would rather not know about the problems so you don't go see your medical team. Then before you know it, the small problems that could've been solved with a change in diet, or a short term prescription or a simple procedure turn into a big deal that's much more difficult, time consuming and scary to resolve.

Either way, when was the last time you had a marital check-up? Most of us invest into our physical health from a prevention stand-point but view our emotional health from a reactive standpoint. We wait until a problem is so bad we have no choice BUT to get help. Do you KNOW where your relationship stands or do you assume because it seems like it's going it must be going great. That because you feel like things are on track your spouse feels like things are on track. Maybe for both of you they are and you get your check-up and get your verbal gold star! Or maybe you spot a small problem that can be resolved with simply communicating it to your partner and adjusting something you were unaware of. And maybe there is a larger problem and it's time to address it. The scenarios are endless but either way if you haven't had your check up, take the plunge. If you're adverse to counseling, never experienced counseling or had a bad experience with counseling try again. Just like dating, sometimes it takes meeting a few to find "the one" :)

If I can't convince you or rather you can't convince your partner to see a "shrink", Check out The Relate Institute's couple questionnaire. For a mere $40, you and your partner individually answer in-depth questions in a yes/no, scale format about all facets of your relationship. It takes approximately 30 minutes, not bad considering the average time spent at the doctor or dentist is a couple of hours. Then you will receive a multi-page assessment comparing your answers with your partners giving you results you can talk about or take them to a therapist to discuss. Either way, you can't beat the price, the convenience and certainly not the benefits!